Monday, July 24, 2006

What's it like to be a normal weight?

Tell me if you think that people will look at this face the same:

















As they would this one:



















I'm not bitching, that's just the way it is. I'm loving it now.

People often ask me "How'd you do it?" However, the more amazing thing to me now is how different the world looks at me. A bad day now is better than a good day was. My overall feeling on life is just elevated.

I'll have a video posted soon that was shot for a local TV station in which I talk about my increased confidence, self image, pride, etc. It's so much more a mental state than the 100 pounds.

But I bet you'd like to hear specifics. What's it like to be of normal size after seeing the world through fat eyes?

The world looks back at you in a different way when you're 300. You don't realize how little respect people gave you when you were fat until you're not anymore. It's the little things you notice at first like people smiling at you rather than turning away.

What else can I tell you is different? I'll just make a list:

I can get up off a couch without "walking" my ass cheeks to the edge, and rocking to stand. In fact, every time I stand up in public, I think of how great it feels to simply stand and not be embarrased.

Speaking of being in public, I can move through a crowded room with ease; squeezing between chairs or people, or whatever with no fear of my ass knocking into things of people.

That reminds me of restaruants. I fit behind a booth no problem.

I don't sweat when I eat now. I used to need a handful of napkins at each meal. That floppy hat? It was for soaking up sweat when I drank beer.

I don't sweat at all now, really. I have to bust my ass in the gym to break a sweat. I have a resting heart rate at 50. I can get into the car on a 90 degree day and get the AC kicking before breaking out.

Ever have to fit in a friend's small car and adjust a seatbelt to maximum, only to then say, "I don't want to wear it." because you can't?

I don't have body odor coming from odd places. Use your imagination for a moment, and you can probably image there are folds in odd placese when you're 50% bodyfat. Those folds and the sweat don't create a pleasant aroma.

I walked outside with my shirt off the other day without thinking about it. I was enjoying some sun when it hit me. "I like the sun???" I like it enough that I may even make this shirtless outside thing a habit.

I own two sleevless shirts, and two skintight shirts.

I had to show my ID to a group of Starbucks employess because they all had assumed I was early 20's. One had suggested late teens. I'm 31.

There's a bodybuilder at the gym who asked me if I was going to do a bodybuilding competition, because "you're all mesomorph".

I can talk to any girl I see with 100% confidence. Confident that I'm not going to get shot down for being fat. I still may say something stupid as hell, and get blown out of the water.

I can have sex in 100's of better positions now. One of the new positions is with a woman. All kidding aside, having sex even at 250 was like trying to hump with a pillow in my lap. A big pillow. It tends to get in the way of things.

One of those "things" is longer now.

The biggest thing I love, and do it often, is smiling at the ladies. All ladies. Not a dirty pervert smile, but a warm smile. Old, young, fat, skinny, 8 to 80, blind deaf or crazy, I'm flashing a smile. And you know what? Most actually smile back! Is it because of the confidence behind it? Is it because I no longer look like a psycho killer?

Who cares? Where I was got me to where I am, so I don't regret where I was. To the contrary. I have a unique perspective on life and the world that makes me appreciate what I was.

And now? I love me and the world responds in kind. It's a good thing.

8 comments:

A Girl Running said...

thanks for such a positive brilliant post - I loved reading it

I started day one of my Body for Life challenge today.

Bobby B said...

Bro.That was great man you put it all in perspective for me I have 75 lbs to go and man its tough..

BSN said...

Great post! I haven't lost nearly as much, but there's a lot I can relate to. Not the sex stuff, of course - I'm married. Married people don't have sex at any weight.

At least, that's what she says...

Josh said...

Lose a bit more, and start wearing some skin tight shirts that show off the pecs and biceps nicely. She'll notice.

Better yet, get the wife involved too, and see if you don't find each other sexier. Even a married woman will have sex is SHE feels sexy.

Brandi said...

Great post! I really enjoy reading your blog! :)

Twice the Man said...

Just because you thinner doesn't mean you no longer look like a psycho killer.

But seriously, great positive post.

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